If I could to talk to Hannah, this is what I would say

Is it beautiful there, Hannah?

Is all your pain gone?

Is all your torment gone?

Are you happy again?

Do you see Jesus every moment?

Now you know why I love Him so much.

Is it always daytime?

Are you busy at work?

Have you seen the place Jesus prepared for me?

Do the flowers grow in different colors I’ve never seen before?

Do you sit in a mansion with your dad?

Do you swim in the crystal river before His throne?

I know you can’t see the pain I’m in down here.

I wouldn’t want you to know how bad it is.

But do you see Jesus when His arms hold me?

Do you see Jesus shining through my pain when I speak to the people in recovery, just like you were?

Do you see Jesus collecting bottle after bottle after bottle of my tears?

You can’t know they’re mine.  It would make you feel so sad, but I know He has them somewhere.

I know there’s no sadness there, only joy.

That’s all I ever wanted for you, my  love, for you to know true joy, to know His peace.

Your veins are full of the Holy Spirit now.  Your eyes, no longer closing and opening, just gazing at Him.

I’m trying to live without you, but it’s so so hard.

Then Jesus comes by my side and whispers, “Don’t cry.  She’s home.  She’s okay.  I’ve got her.”

No better place for you, my love.

Rejoice, sing, dance, swim, play music, laugh.  It’s all yours now.

I promise you, I’m not giving up on Jesus, Hannah.  We will be together in His presence one day.

He will put your sweet gentle hand in mine, and then put His hand over ours….locked together forever.

Miss you forever, Han.

Feel free to leave a comment if this letter spoke to you in some way. 


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